"Have an affair, act like an adult for once"...

Now before I get into this blog ( cuz it has the potential to get long) I just wanna say I don't endorse infidelity...I'm just playin "Devil's Advocate" on this topic. I've had a few convo's this week all separate and all on this topic and I found it pretty interesting...


The way of the world/our society is monogamy. 1 guy, 1 girl...yadda yadda etc etc...As u make the transition from "talkin" to "dating" to "that's my man/girl" to "wifey", to "engaged" to "married"...The monogamy requirement increases. My first question to my blog followers is...How realistic do u think this notion is? I mean before you answer that...Everyone knows that as people get older and grow they change as people. So keep that in mind as u respond.

My first convo on the topic was in NY with my boy...He's got a girl he's feelin pretty hard (though he doesn't wanna admit it) But He was kinda doin his own thing before he met her. You know how that goes. Anyhoo...He's slowing down a bit since he's feelin "the new chick" but he's had these on going "arrangements" prior to gettin with her. So his statement to me was..."I'm always gonna have those "arrangements" with said women, even if "new chick" became my girl.

So of course I was curious..

So you have an..."understanding" with these other women (2 to be exact) That it's not a relationship thing..it's really just a sexual "understanding". You'll have "new chick" at home. That's your main...but if one of ur "ahem..."understanding's" call...then its cool. No harm no foul. (to him)

Now he's not married, not engaged, really just dating/entering a relationship...But of course you KNOW "new chick" isn't aware of these "understanding's". And although I didn't ask, I'm sure the concept of her having some "understandings" of her own is out of the question...unless she keeps that to herself...lol

So moving on....Situation 2..My boy actually called and woke me up this morning cuz he said he had a question. So He was having a convo with the fellas and they were basically talkin about that point when u decide to propose. They said that since youre committing yourself to one 'ahem vagina for the rest of your life...all bets are off right up until the wedding. So basically they're saying...get all the ass u can get til you say "i do". Cuz once u say "i do" its a done deal...

Now this was also kinda interesting to me...My boy's question to me ...was "do women go on a spree of their own prior to the wedding" I told him in my opinion no...Once we decide we want to MARRY you, We don't view it as "one penis forever". (Well not ALL of us) Men view it was a life sentence, while women tend to view it more as a new beginning (in my opinion...)

So he was really like "wow" i thought both parties involved were going on (his words) "a fuckin spree" before the wedding...I was like um...no. Gross.

So he said ok, he was takin this info back to the fellas because according to him...they felt the women / brides-to-be were doin the same thing! and he's be callin me again later..( so there may be a part 2)


Now situation number 3 is from yet another convo....In a nutshell,(cuz this is gettin long) guy likes girl girl is kinda feelin guy...both are in "situations" as T.I put it lol. But neither care. Once again another "understanding" i guess...

So i guess I'm wondering how realistic the concept of "fidelity" is anymore. With so many "open marriages" arrangements" situations" etc etc it's seeming like the whole world is becoming alot more accepting of the "don't ask don't tell" approach to relationships.

Will & Jada are rumored to have one...and regardless of how much you dispute it, i think EVERYONE has a certain someone in their life...where...relationship or not...If THAT person wanted it....they could get it. I'm just sayin...



Now I do remember back in the day when I played those kinda games...(you all have so don't judge me). You know the stuff u see in old music videos...lol

You're out with ur dude and u see side dude...you give each other that "understanding" nod, cuz he's out with his chick too...

So many artists have written about this, (Alicia Key's "Mr. Man", Pleasure P "Boyfriend #2", Tweet "Call Me") I could go on...but u get me... so many videos depict this scene...just makes me wonder...

So feedback people...once again let me say ..I"m a HOPELESS romantic and kinda old school in alot of ways when it comes to relationships...so I'm just wondering...In this day and age am I the one who's out of touch...?

Deauces!