Above the rim...

Ok so this is gonna be short, but after an earlier convo with a..."ahem..."friend" I have to ask...

Are rim-jobs the thing to do now?

*A "rim job" is a slang term for analingus. That means oral stimulation of the anus.*

We're they always and i missed the memo?

And to clarify I'm not fond of the idea too much on either end, be it giving or receiving, but I digress...

This "friend" stated that he (yes I said HE which is what makes me raise an eyebrow...) prefers, and on occasion actually REQUESTS these (and has apparently been obliged by more than a few)

Now my dilemma with this if I may be blunt...We're talkin about ur ASS here...I'm not putting my lips, tongue, or any appendage of mine near any grown man's asshole. And as a man, why are u requesting any anal...."stimulation"

I mean I'm not a man, and I really don't know if this is some secret passed around male circles that no one talks about. Maybe I was let in on a secret that I shouldn't have been...I dunno...

So now I'm askin, ladies are WE doing this and not speakin on it? I for one refuse...I'm sorry but no...( plus ol' boy is gettin the mean side-eye from me right now) And don't worry I have NOOOOOOOOOOOO desire for u to have ur tongue in my ass, I'm good. But inquiring minds need to know...

Am I out of the loop? ( not that I care cuz I'm still not doin it...no judgement tho, i pinky swear)

Are guys really that into anal play now?

Help me out here people...

Wtf- ism.....of the Day.

This was my exact convo with my boy (ahem') Via text..

Him : Hey to you too...

Me: Um, Random....Hi how are u?

Him: chillin thanks for responding THIS TIME. You didnt reply to my forward

INSERT HERE :I don't do forwards, I think they're wack as hell. I stopped doing those in like 02'

Me: I was at work and I don't usually respond to forwards. You took that personal?

Him: Yeah but you couldve made an exception cuz it was me...

INSERT HERE: Exception to WHAT exactly...

Me: Well it was a FORWARD so I thought you sent that out to everyone not just me.

Him: I don't send messages out to everyone about huggin them...what I look like a bisexual?

INSERT HERE: MY blank stare... :-| and before I could text back...

Him: I'm NOT!!!

INSERT HERE:Whoa kimosabe...U sure abt that...Cuz I'm not all of a sudden *raised eyebrow*

Me: Umm....bisexual? No (not til now) I just didn't think I was the only girl you sent it to

Him: You my babygirl OK?

INSERT HERE: What just happened?...Something you wanna share my dude? Now this is when i ask myself WHY I'm even entertaining this madness...had to be due to IMMENSE boredom at work.

Me: ...uh...well sorry I didnt respond.

Now....WHEN exactly did dudes become this sensitive and butt-hurt acting?!

This shyt is Soooooooooooooooooooo not cute!

OK don't get me wrong, I love a man that can express himself properly when his emotions come into play. Be it through actions, or verbally. Nothing more attractive than a man that can EXPRESS how he feels about u.

But this shyt right here?! COME ON!!!!

SMDH. So after a little more back and forth random banter...

Me: Well I'm at work sooo...

Him: I would give u a nice body massage when u got home and a nice bubble bath. I would bathe you and put u in your night clothes on for my hard working queen

INSERT HERE :Me gaggin, cuz aside from that being all kinds of grammatically wrong, It was wack as hell...smh


ME: Awwww ( didn't know what the hell else to say to that)

Him: I like to see you smile. (Did I say I was smiling?)I remember your smile

Me: OK look at u tryin to make me blush... ( yeah i was bullshittin slightly, but so what? )

Him: Y would u say that?! y don't u think i care for you as much as I do?! y is that so hard for you to notice?!


INSERT HERE: Um...WHAT?! Wait...did he just come at me on some real emo shyt!? Is this what its all about now?!

Me: um...u ok? I was jokin...

Him: O, OK baby


INSERT HERE: Now this is just ONE convo I chose to share.But this madness has been QUITE common for 09'. So Color me confuzuled.


I've been encountering all kinds of madness when it comes to the gentlemen this year. And I'm not quite sure what is causing it. Venus in retrograde? Jupiter aligned with Mars? Some other such tom-foolery...Or just one big huge practical joke that EVERYONE but me is in on?

Guys...I love ya'll. I truly do. My closest friends in the world actually are guys ( aside from my mommy :). I'm a sap.)

Anyway...PULL YOUR PANTIES UP!! THIS SHYT ISN'T SEXY IN THE LEAST! Ya'll are coming off just a hair too bitchtastic for my taste...
....aaaaaaaaaaaaaand exhale...

I just had to vent and get that off my chest.

Peace!