You ever wonder...sometimes watching those around you...weather you know them personally or not....Why God just "sees it" for some people and not necessarily for others...or correction...not in the same ways...
Everyone isn't destined to live lavishly...people have callings, I get that. I know what God has for me is for ME and it may not be whats meant for someone else and vice vera...But I can't help but wonder...with no jealousy lacing it...WHY him/her...but not me ... (yet). I've got such a dynamic circle...it's very small. But as I get older and wiser I much prefer it that way more often that not...I've got friends on their grind, I don't have a lazy bunch around me. Just can't help but wonder sometimes...am i not grindingnhard enough? Am i missing something somewhere? was I not destined for that life? If no....then why not? I know better than to question God and the way he moves so I'm just gonna call this me thinking outloud...
I see the pics, the cars, the trips, the obvious success and money flowing...and for them...I'm happy. 100% happy to see those I love happy, but wondering...when's it my turn? Do I get to go shopping just because, get the house, the closets, the car, the LIFE....that you only read about or see on tv but don't think real life people outside of celebrities live it? Don't get me wrong, it's really not about the material , although I'm not gonna lie like some of that isn't cool as hell to have...it's about living the life of less worries. Your bills are paid, nothing's getting cut off, no need to call and make payment arrangements, no juggling, being able to take care of those around you..that life of comfort and security...it almost seems unreal sometimes...but it's so very not.
Everything has a season, all in due time. I'm very VERY thankful for all I have, and how far I've come, But I guess...when I'm juggling struggles every now and then...I just can't help but wonder...when's it my turn...?
