OK so this has been on my mind and quite present in my life as a mixed chick (Both parents are Guyanese which is in South America riiiiiight by Venezuela. Mommy is black actually pretty dark skinned too. Dad is 1/2 Portuguese, and 1/2 Indian looks like a white man IMO, but yadda yadda yadda. To me I look black, but I'm mixed)
Anyway after a long convo with a friend today on the topic of hair, I felt the need to blog. Now my friend Terrye is very dark skinned, (half of me has always envied pretty dark skin) I'm more of a caramel/french vanilla depending on the season...but I digress...
She recently started a new job and for the past 3 days in a row her hair has been the topic of much office debate, and just today a full out argument. She's black not mixed in any way to her knowledge, but her hair is naturally curly. It's not long, it's not thick, it's just curly. The kind of curly that when it's wet it looks like a jheri curl and when u wet it u can slick it back.
A co-worker asked her today..."What kind of gel do you use in your hair to slick it like that?"
She said "I don't use any gel, I just wet my hair real quick in the bathroom..." (as she was walking back to her desk.)
The co-worker stops...rolls her eyes...and says "Yeah right, you don't have to lie. If you didn't want to tell me just say so"
So Terrye being the person that she is asked the woman..."Why would I lie about some gel, and I left my purse at my desk, I have no gel my hair is just wet"
The woman responds with "Oh well then you're not black then...OK"
Terrye was like..."wtf, I'm not black cuz I put water on my hair and it curls!?"
The co-worker "Well maybe you're black but just mixed..."
So in short .... I don't get it. When was the law passed that black women cant have hair? Or better yet "Good" or "manageable" hair and not be mixed or something...
2ND story...I was in the beauty supply store yesterday...I was looking for some wax for my edges...(thts irrelevant to the story tho...lol) Anyway the girl behind the counter apparently thought I was shopping for hair. My own hair is natural, no relaxer or anything, I've had relaxers, weaves, braids, but I prefer wearing my own hair best, It's not short though, so sometimes it's easier to just not mess with it. I had it in a ponytail this particular day cuz I just didn't give a F*ck. I was hot, and since my hair isn't chemically treated when I sweat it frizzes up. So the girl comes down and starts lookin at my hair, telling my friend about the color and texture as far as matching up a weave (I was on the phone so I wasnt payin her too much attention) But I heard her ask..."Is that her natural hair...?"
Me: O_0
My friend: "Um...yes that's hers..."
Her: "oh.... and walks away"
So I'm like...ok wtf?!
Why can't it be my hair? Now I'm not gonna be unrealistic like I don't know WHY she asked...
I saw the movie, the amount of $$$ spent on hair that isnt natural to make it LOOK natural is insane. But weaves, extensions whatever... didn't originate with Black women...White women perfected extensions EONS ago...But no one will stop a white woman and say "Is that your natural hair" It's just not as common. I mean Jessica Simpson has her own LINE of extensions, Kim Zolciack from the Real Housewives of Atlanta has a wig line...Kim Kardashian ADMITTEDLY wears extensions. But No one will look at any of them...(except maybe Kim Z.) Like "Bitch Quit Lying" if they say that's their own hair.
A black woman with curly hair be it long or short, or un-relaxed or even permmed hair that carries any length is automatically looked at like...hmmmmmmm.....
Kenya Moore is a perfect example...(and i chose this pic cuz it's sexy as hell :-D
Now yes this is her own hair. Do I know what she uses or if it's relaxed no I don't. But she's a black woman, with some beautiful hair...so she must be mixed!...right?! Smh...
Keisha Knight Pulliam...
Now ya'll have seen her grown up with all that thick bushy hair...naturally hers...
And the whole web was hollerin about Oprah's natural hair pic that she dropped...
I just don't get it...
Help me understand black women? Is it a competition thing? I've even had friends...once they see my hair out...say "Oh you have long hair for a black girl, ...oh thats right you're mixed though"
What if I wasn't?! If I hadn't told you i was you wouldnt know. I'm not walking around looking like Freddie from "A Different World"
It's become such a "thing" that Tyra Banks had to make a damn announcement about the "self loathing" going on among black women and her determination to wear her natural hair now...
My followers don't tend to comment, so I'm not expecting too much feedback, But I had to ask...
Peace.